Homesick

Today was a so-so day for me. I'm really hoping that when I start this new job that my energy will increase and my motivation will increase. I've just been so lonely that I never want to do anything. All I want to do is veg out on the computer or at the tv because it's all I can do. Daylan isn't here and when he is, he's playing his video games. Half the time it doesn't bother me because I have shows recording, dinner to cook or I want to write.

Lately I've been skyping with friends. It's been mostly Cory. Today I finally got to talk to Dennis. We ended that conversation about an hour ago and all I've been doing is crying. I'm just blaming it on the onions I chopped. I miss my friends so damn much. I miss hanging out with my son. And Nessa deleted Mikey and Dennis (and won't accept the friend request) so she may be gone forever. I know she blocked me. The fight we had in October was bad but it wasn't that bad. I just miss my friends.

I'm lucky that Brandon, Cory, and Case can occasionally skype. I miss talking to Kristen, but she is in St. Louis. Dennis finally started to use his account again. I'm lucky I can talk to them so I don't have to have a phone and so I can see them. It makes it easier but it's not like having them face to face on a couch with me. Now I know what military wives feel like when their husbands are overseas. You're lucky you get the chance to see them and talk to them, but it's not the same. You can't do things with them or go places with them.

I hope by Saturday my mood will improve. I hope I work full time and make bank so I can keep my mind off of how much I miss everyone in Florida and how much I love them.